What are you doing right now to position your husband as the enemy? How can you change this and be more accountable? Can you reframe and overcome these emotions with a simple mantra?
In this podcast episode, I speak about how my insecurities and mindreading almost ruined my 21st-anniversary trip.
In This Podcast
- The mantra that saved me
- 3 steps for you to snap out of it
The mantra that saved me
We were a half-mile in and I am gasping for air…
I found myself spiraling down this rabbit hole of negativity, self-doubt, and self-defeat. All my insecurities surfaced and I was thinking that Willie did this to set me up…
I wanted to quit BUT, I was going to make this mountain my b***h and I didn’t want to ruin this vacation. I had to take control of these feelings and this mantra came to mind…
Veronica, all you have to do is take 1 step, that’s it… Just take one step. And then after, take the next step, regardless of what it looks like. Just take that one step!
3 steps to snap out of it
You cannot position anyone in the place of blame when you are feeling insecurities come up.
- Ask yourself ‘Is this my insecurity or is this a fact’?: Think about all of the times you wanted to place blame on your partner in times when you were feeling insecure. The way to differentiate between the two is to ask yourself, is this 100% a fact? Be real honest.
Write down these insecurities so that you are aware of them. Everyone struggles with insecurities from time to time, so be patient and compassionate with yourself.
- Validate yourself: This looks like acknowledging your strengths, acknowledging your efforts and your progress and it also involves accepting your limitations and your flaws.
Self-validation is also a form of treating yourself with kindness, which goes back to one step, next step [because] you are able to be your biggest cheerleader, you’re able to realize ‘you know what, I’m struggling right now, and this is hard and that is okay’.
- Communicate your fears: Communicate your fears and frustrations, not so that the other person carries them, but that you realize that they exist for you. And by sharing them with your partner, you can both be aware of them and work through them together.
- Marriage Mistake #5: Willie & Veronica Talk About How Couples Use Sex As a Weapon | EU 51
- Marriage Mistake #4: Willie & Veronica Talk About How to Stop Wrestling with Change in Your Marriage | EU 50
- Mistake #3: “I Avoid Conflict”- How This Impacts your Marriage | EU 49
- Marriage Mistake #2: Veronica & Her Girls Talk about Self-Worth and The Consequences of Putting Yourself Last | EU 48
- The 5 Mistakes to Avoid for a Healthy Marriage: Mistake #1 | EU 47
- Download your FREE workbook HERE – THE 5 MISTAKES TO AVOID FOR A HEALTHY MARRIAGE: TIPS FROM A THERAPIST
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- Empowered And Unapologetic Free Course
Meet Veronica Cisneros
I’m a licensed therapist and women walk into my office every day stressed and disconnected. As a mom of three daughters, I want my girls to know who they are and feel confident about their future. I can’t think of a better way to help other women than by demonstrating an empowered and unapologetic life.
So I started Empowered and Unapologetic to be a safe space for women to be vulnerable and change their lives for the better before she ever needs to see a therapist.
Thanks for listening!
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Empowered and Unapologetic is part of the Practice of the Practice Podcast Network, a network of podcasts seeking to help you thrive, imperfectly. To hear other podcasts like the Bomb Mom Podcast, Imperfect Thriving, or Beta Male Revolution, go to practiceofthepractice.com/network.